I am opening my eyes and discovering that it - Mormonism - is probably not true

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  • user warning: Table './exmo_08072012/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: UPDATE cache_filter SET data = '<p>by angelina5 Dec 2011</p>\n<p>I started to open my eyes last night. I had come across \"anti-mormon\" material before but I didn\'t not react to it. I came across this website last night and Richard Packham\'s site and I am still in shock of everything that has been hidden from me. I am uncovering evidences that disprove the truthfulness of the Gospel. I am not naive but is it possible that everything i thought I would believe in forever has been a lie? I joined the Church ten years ago and I have loved it so much. But those evidences can\'t be ignored!! Even the simple fact that we can\'t question anything because it might be \"anti-mormon\" is a huge red flag.<br />\nToday I have felt a little liberated and greatly empowered for some reason. I feel a little freer. I always thought I would feel bad and depressed if I truly questioned the Church. But I haven\'t felt so empowered and happy for a while.<br />\nThoughts are welcome!</p>\n<hr />\n<p>quinlansolo<br />\nRe: Don\'t stop there........<br />\nRead Four Gospels, discrepancies are as numerous as in Mormon Church.</p>\n<hr />\nhelamonster<br />\nWell, I won\'t push on you the idea that it\'s not true, because you\'re already searching on your own.<br />\nYou\'ll discover what you discover when you discover it.\n<p>Don\'t be afraid to ask questions here. We\'re also here to support you if it becomes a bit much to take.</p>\n<hr />\nlostinutah<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nCults try to own you by keeping the truth from you and instilling fear. Once you realize nobody has control over you except you and there\'s nothing to fear except others trying to own you, it\'s a very liberating thing.\n<hr />\nRaptor Jesus<br />\nI hate to be Captain Bringdown.<br />\nBut, yes, it is all a lie.\n<p>And you will have quite a few conflicting emotions for quite some time.</p>\n<p>Freedom will be one of them. Betrayal and Anger will come as well.</p>\n<p>Welcome to the club! Enjoy your reading, and ask for help as you need it.</p>\n<hr />\nangelina5<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nI actually don\'t feel any anger because I feel bad that those people are so deeply engrained.i feel stupid for blindly believing all those years. You guys are great!! Thanks!<br />\nThe reason behind Joseph Smith final arrest is very interesting. Was he really trying to prevent a newspaper from pulishing his sexual liaisons? And the Masonry symbols!? Anyways. I am learning a lot. I still believe in God and I am still not 100% confident that He still loves me because of what I am uncovering about the Church. I will always believe in God. I just want to do it in my own terms.\n<hr />\nkolobian<br />\nRe: I hate to be Captain Bringdown.<br />\nAnd when i say this, I don\'t say it to be facetious or anything like that. I\'m saying this because there will be a nagging sensation in your subconsciouss that will have to be addressed sooner or later and you may as well get started now:\n<p>You will not get your tithing back.</p>\n<p>I know that sounds harsh, as if I\'m saying the only thing that matters to you is money. I know it\'s not. It\'s not about the money.</p>\n<p>It\'s about buyer\'s remorse. You cannot get a refund, and exchanges are never a good idea.</p>\n<p>If you feel like you\'ve made a huge investment in kolobianism and you don\'t want it all to be for naught, PLEASE take a step back and breathe before you let the inevitable fisherman try to lure you into other religions.</p>\n<p>That will only be treating the symptom. Sorry about your tithing. It did not go to help poor people. But if you\'re ever in Salt Lake City on a hot summer day you can stop by the City Creek Mall and enjoy the air conditioning. It may not be worth 10 years of tithing, but it\'s worth something.</p>\n<p>That\'s my .02.</p>\n<hr />\nRaptor Jesus<br />\nFeeling stupid is normal too.<br />\nSo is expecting god to hate you.\n<p>Good news there, though!</p>\n<p>The Mormon god doesn\'t exist.</p>\n<p>So, he can\'t hate you for what you\'ve found out.</p>\n<hr />\nscooter<br />\nyou\'ll do fine<br />\nthere are many caring people here who have blazed the trail you are about to follow.\n<p>They all agree that it\'s worth it.</p>\n<p>wooden submarines? really? if it was a submarine made of wood, it would have to float, right?</p>\n<hr />\nSusieQ#1<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nWelcome to the world of God Myths disguised as the One and Only True Church! It\'s all the same stuff: metaphysical, supernatural, visionary claims by someone who says God speaks to him/her!<br />\nNothing new here folks.<br />\nMove along! :-)<br />\nFor the Big Picture, get the book: The Power of Myth by Joseph Campbell. The hardback is great. The pictures are terrific! I\'m big on pictures! :-)\n<hr />\nCA girl<br />\nWe are all here for you angelina5<br />\nCause we\'ve all been where you are. That combination of finding the truth out and then all the feelings that go with it. That first pulling at the threads of Mormonism and watching how fast it unravels. And weirdly, the more you learn, the more you realize how much proof there is that you are right and the Mormons are lying (yes, some inadvertently because they really want to believe but still...) This board is the best place to come for questions because there are so many who have done so much research not just about the facts of Mormonism but how it can actually be a damaging way to live your life. They want to be seen as a harmless religion that is worth living, even if you don\'t understand everything. But that\'s as false as the first vision story.\n<p>Some days life will seem better and some days it will be hard but life just keeps improving as you go along. I\'m sure most people here would second my \"testimony\" of that. Good luck to you.</p>\n<hr />\nGlo<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nI felt the same way.<br />\nThe minute I heard about the DNA discrepancies I KNEW it wasn\'t true.\n<p>It was a relief to realize that my instincts had been correct all along.</p>\n<hr />\nscooter<br />\nBeloved speaks truth<br />\nif nothing else, watch the Bill Moyers PBS special with Joseph Campbell.\n<p>It will be one of the most amazing experiences you can ever have.</p>\n<p>haven\'t read the book, but it\'s a fabulous recommendation.</p>\n<hr />\nhonestone<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nOf course you feel empowered now. YOU are in charge and they aren\'t. Glad you did some research and did it on your own. Your life will be so much better out of the cult- no more pushy people to tell you how to spend your money or time, no more lies to spread to others, no more wasted energy doing Church jobs, and no more praise of JS-the man who married the wives of other men. Good luck and know you have chosen the right path - one free of Mormonism.\n<hr />\nblueorchid<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nWhen I was a kid, there was a big framed quote in the church near the front that said \"Know the truth and the truth will set you free.\" They really shouldn\'t have had that up since the truth only works against them.\n<p>I don\'t think \"Honesty is the best policy\" would work out too well for them either.</p>\n<p>Good for you for not being afraid of the truth. I am excited for you.</p>\n<hr />\nanagrammy<br />\nIt is tempting to plunge right into the facts that you were forbidden to access.<br />\nHowever, I support those who are directing you to read Joseph Campbell\'s \"Power of Myth\" and here\'s why:\n<p>Feeling you are stupid for having been duped is common and Joseph Campbell offers a cogent answer to the question, \"How could I fall for this stuff?\" You are drawn to the mythology behind it. You read this and you\'ll understand why people followed Joseph Smith in spite of obvious evidence that he was an adulterer, dishonest, etc.</p>\n<p>Mixed emotions will be frequent--some days feeling free and light, other days feeling guilty and isolated. There is something fabulous for women when we finally say, \"Enough!\" and reclaim our power over our own life. We are not Adamic retreads who are not as accountable for our actions as men. We are fully functional human beings--each one different from the next. Not wombs and tits burdened unnecessarily with brains.</p>\n<p>I commend you for having the courage to read what you were told not to read. You are like the hero in George Orwell\'s 1984--you stepped away from the monitoring eye of Big Brother. Congratulations and welcome to the board.</p>\n<p>Post often!</p>\n<p>Anagrammy</p>\n<hr />\njessica<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nThree sites that helped me--<br />\n<a href=\"http://www.mormonthink.com/\" title=\"http://www.mormonthink.com/\">http://www.mormonthink.com/</a>\n<p>Video about BOA<br />\n<a href=\"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hcyzkd_m6KE\" title=\"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hcyzkd_m6KE\">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hcyzkd_m6KE</a></p>\n<p>Video about leaving the church by John Dehlin<br />\n<a href=\"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZQJc5SxnVs\" title=\"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZQJc5SxnVs\">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZQJc5SxnVs</a></p>\n<hr />\nangelina5<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nLol! Thank you! The truth will set me free. I still feel wobbly but a lot of things make sense now.\n<hr />\nangelina5<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nWow thank you for this!!! I have looked at mormonthink.com and have found great things on there.\n<hr />\nEx-CultMember<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nYou are lucky that it isn\'t taking you as long as some of us to swallow the hard truth. I started reading stuff critical of Mormonism but it took me a long time to finally let go of the church. It really bothered me and I wanted so badly for it to be true. It was all I knew (because I grew up in the church). I am far happier NOW, but there was some growing pains for me as I transitioned out. I was truly brainwashed.\n<p>You are lucky you haven\'t been in the church that long and that you are actually using your BRAIN. Its pretty crazy all the stuff you\'ll be learning and realizing that so many Mormons have NO IDEA about it.</p>\n<hr />\nangelina5<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nI felt like I could take on the whole world today and I feel like I can see LDS individuals as a circle if people who are so engrained in their beliefs, like I was an outsider. Very interesting indeed!\n<hr />\nangelina5<br />\nRe: I hate to be Captain Bringdown.<br />\nThank you. I have stopped paying my tithing a few months ago actually. I have tithing settlement next Sunday ;-) Will<br />\nLet you know how that goes!\n<hr />\nangelina5<br />\nRe: Beloved speaks truth<br />\nI\'m excited to watch the pbs program. Will make sure to watch that. I am making a list of materials.\n<hr />\n<p>Ex-CultMember<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nHere\'s a list of some good reliable books about Mormonism that provide the truth. The ones with stars I consider priority reading in each category. Obviously you don\'t need to read them all but its nice to have a list if you need it.</p>\n<p>History/Joseph Smtih<br />\n* Mormonism - Shadow or Reality? (or The Changing World of Mormonism) by Jerald &amp; Sandra Tanner<br />\n* An Insider’s View of Mormon Origins by Grant Palmer<br />\n* No Man Knows My History: The Life of Joseph Smith by Fawn M. Broadie<br />\n* The Mormon Hierarchy: Origins of Power by D. Michael Quinn<br />\n* The Mormon Hierarchy: Extensions of Power by D. Michael Quinn<br />\nUnder the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer<br />\nMormon America, The Power and the Promise by Richard Ostling, Joan K. Ostling<br />\nOne Nation Under Gods: A History of the Mormon Church by Richard Abanes<br />\nJoseph Smith: Rough Stone Rolling by Richard Lyman Bushman<br />\nJoseph Smith: The Making of a Prophet by Dan Vogel<br />\nJoseph Smith: The First Mormon by Donna Hill<br />\nThe Prophet Puzzle: Interpretive Essays on Joseph Smith by Bryan Waterman<br />\nJoseph Smith and the Origins of The Book of Mormon by David Persuitte<br />\nThe Keystone of Mormonism by Arza Evans<br />\nThe New Mormon History: Revisionist Essays on the Past by D. Michael Quinn<br />\nMormon Mavericks: Essays on Dissenters - John Sillito and Susan Staker</p>\n<p>Polygamy<br />\n* In Sacred Loneliness: The Plural Wives of Joseph Smith by Todd Compton<br />\n* Mormon Enigma: Emma Hale Smith by Linda King Newell<br />\nMormon Polygamy: A History by Richard S. Van Wagoner<br />\nSolemn Covenant: The Mormon Polygamous Passage by B. Carmon Hardy<br />\nNauvoo Polygamy: “… but we called it celestial marriage” by George D. Smith</p>\n<p>Book of Mormon<br />\n*New Approaches to the Book of Mormon: Explorations in Critical Methodology by Brent Metcalfe<br />\n*Quest for the Gold Plates: Thomas Stuart Ferguson’s Archaeological Search for the Book of Mormon by Stan Larson<br />\n*American Apocrypha: Essays on the Book of Mormon by Dan Vogel and Brent Lee Metcalfe<br />\nLosing a Lost Tribe: Native Americans, DNA, and the Mormon Church by Simon G. Southerton</p>\n<p>Book of Abraham<br />\n*By His Own Hand Upon Papyrus: A New Look at the Joseph Smith Papyri by Charles M. Larson</p>\n<p>Folk Magic/Occult Practices<br />\n* Early Mormonism and the Magic World View by D. Michael Quinn</p>\n<p>Temple<br />\n*Evolution of the Mormon Temple Ceremony: 1842-1990 by Jerald and Sandra Tanner<br />\nThe Mysteries of Godliness: A History of Mormon Temple Worship - David John Buerger</p>\n<p>Mountain Meadows Massacre<br />\nBlood of the Prophets: Brigham Young and the Massacre at Mountain Meadows by Will Bagley<br />\nThe Mountain Meadows Massacre by Brooks, Juanita</p>\n<p>Misc<br />\nLine Upon Line: Essays on Mormon Doctrine by Gary James Bergera<br />\nPower From On High: The Development of Mormon Priesthood - Gregory A. Prince</p>\n<hr />\ndarth jesus<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nwelcome to the forum! glad you decided to take the red pill.\n<p>i have nothing else to add. my comments and thoughts are pretty much in alignment with what everybody has already said.</p>\n<p>the road out of the cult is not easy but it\'s doable. there\'s a lot of pain, disappointment, sadness peppered with anger. that\'s normal.</p>\n<p>anything you need just post.</p>\n<hr />\njessica<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nYou are welcome! Start looking for books and other resources..when I first started questioning I couldn\'t get enough anytime anyone mentioned a website or book here I\'d look it up or try to get it. Still have a few books to read but I\'ve got the basics down now. I pored over Mormonthink for a long time, its a great website! John Dehlin\'s Mormonstories is good as well, (<a href=\"http://mormonstories.org/\" title=\"http://mormonstories.org/\">http://mormonstories.org/</a>) I finally heard through his podcasts real people having the same concerns I did, not the usual pray about it but real people with real problems.\n<hr />\nSL Cabbie<br />\nAnd the Beautiful Thing About Coming Here...<br />\nNobody is going to tell you Satan has you firmly in his grasp...\n<p>All reasonable roads of inquiry lead out of the LDS Church...</p>\n<p>And it\'s nobody\'s fault who\'s alive these days that it\'s a fraud...</p>\n<p>Welcome....</p>\n<hr />\nangelina5<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nThank you for taking the time to write all of this. The more I discover, the better I feel actually.\n<p>angelina5<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nI just started to upload his podcasts. Thanks!</p>\n<hr />\n<p>mia<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nA word of caution:</p>\n<p>Don\'t think anyone at church will understand, or want to hear about your discoveries. Don\'t think they will have answers. They don\'t even want to hear the questions. People at church may say and do some incredibly rude and hurtful things. You will lose friends. Just know that it\'s not about you.</p>\n<hr />\npresbyterian<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nAt the risk of insulting the atheists here, I believe God still has you enfolded in His loving arms. Take some time to look into other faiths and see if one is a good fit.\n<hr />\n<p>angelina5<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nI have already seen a little bit. I asked my husband about Adam/ God, the Masonry and his first question was: \"Have you been reading anti-Mormon literature?\". He couldn\'t answer why do we share symbols with the freemasons.</p>\n<hr />\nlostinutah<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nALso, be aware that threads here get closed after a certain length, so start another if you want, it\'s not personal when it\'s closed.\n<hr />\nangelina5<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nI really needed to hear this. I believed in God before I joined the Church and always will. I am still not confident on how He feels about my discovery that the Church is most likely not true.\n<hr />\nmia<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nwalk softly with DH. I was a rare case, we both left at the same time. Just know he may not be on the same page. If he was BIC he has a lot more to purge than a convert. It can be a rough and very long road.\n<p>We both still have a strong belief in God. We have that in common. I think it made the transition easier.</p>\n<hr />\norphan<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nRaptor, you need to let this young lady know who you are. She\'s trying to find the truth. If you have questions Angelina5 someone on this site can help. Jim\n<hr />\nangelina5<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nThank you! Who is Raptor?\n<hr />\nhonestone<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nGlad you are still a believer in God and there are so many churches out there to fulfill that desire to worship in a group setting if that is what you want....and guess what...no one will track you down for tithing or to ask Why haven\'t you been to church? Go at your own pace and maybe with time your hubby may try one out as well.\n<hr />\nimaworkinonit<br />\nPLEASE go slow on revealing doubts to your husband<br />\nI highly recommend \"Combatting Cult Mind Control\" by Steven Hassan. It entertaining, you get to learn about the Moonies, and you\'ll learn about how you were controlled.\n<p>There\'s a section on helping someone out of a cult. If you go too fast with your husband, you activate cult defensiveness (the accusation that you were reading anti-mormon literature), and then he won\'t listen to you. You become the enemy.</p>\n<p>Try talking about Bible problems first. Mormons KNOW there are problems with the Bible. So they are more open to that. Possible areas of discussion: creation story vs. evolution; the Noah Story; talking donkeys; sun standing still during battle; age of the earth 6000 years? Try reading \"The Age of Reason\" by Thomas Paine for more ideas.</p>\n<p>But many of Mormonism\'s beliefs rest on Bible stories. Example: the Tower of Babel links to the Book of Mormon.</p>\n<p>Good luck. You are on your way, girl! Life is better out here!</p>\n<hr />\nforbiddencokedrinker<br />\nRe: I hate to be Captain Bringdown.<br />\nMy advice is that you skip it. Tell them something came up. They will give you a copy of your tithing donations in the mail if they have to, because I believe law requires them to, but I would have to look it up. If they won\'t tell them you need the paper to file for taxes, and that you don\'t have time to actually come in. Once you put it off past January, it won\'t really be an issue for the Bishop, because he will have already sent off his yearly report to SLC.\n<hr />\nforbiddencokedrinker<br />\nRe: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true<br />\nI don\'t know if God exists or not. I will tell you one thing, if he does, then he probably doesn\'t hate you for using your gift of free will, since he was the one that gave it to you. This applies to all man made religions, and all their holy books.\n<p>\"Recovery from Mormonism - www.exmormon.org\"</p>\n', created = 1544925149, expire = 1545011549, headers = '', serialized = 0 WHERE cid = '2:beb6ae8b1c87232e1db2b60848004603' in /home/exmormon/public_html/d6/drupal/includes/cache.inc on line 112.

by angelina5 Dec 2011

I started to open my eyes last night. I had come across "anti-mormon" material before but I didn't not react to it. I came across this website last night and Richard Packham's site and I am still in shock of everything that has been hidden from me. I am uncovering evidences that disprove the truthfulness of the Gospel. I am not naive but is it possible that everything i thought I would believe in forever has been a lie? I joined the Church ten years ago and I have loved it so much. But those evidences can't be ignored!! Even the simple fact that we can't question anything because it might be "anti-mormon" is a huge red flag.
Today I have felt a little liberated and greatly empowered for some reason. I feel a little freer. I always thought I would feel bad and depressed if I truly questioned the Church. But I haven't felt so empowered and happy for a while.
Thoughts are welcome!


quinlansolo
Re: Don't stop there........
Read Four Gospels, discrepancies are as numerous as in Mormon Church.


helamonster
Well, I won't push on you the idea that it's not true, because you're already searching on your own.
You'll discover what you discover when you discover it.

Don't be afraid to ask questions here. We're also here to support you if it becomes a bit much to take.


lostinutah
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Cults try to own you by keeping the truth from you and instilling fear. Once you realize nobody has control over you except you and there's nothing to fear except others trying to own you, it's a very liberating thing.
Raptor Jesus
I hate to be Captain Bringdown.
But, yes, it is all a lie.

And you will have quite a few conflicting emotions for quite some time.

Freedom will be one of them. Betrayal and Anger will come as well.

Welcome to the club! Enjoy your reading, and ask for help as you need it.


angelina5
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
I actually don't feel any anger because I feel bad that those people are so deeply engrained.i feel stupid for blindly believing all those years. You guys are great!! Thanks!
The reason behind Joseph Smith final arrest is very interesting. Was he really trying to prevent a newspaper from pulishing his sexual liaisons? And the Masonry symbols!? Anyways. I am learning a lot. I still believe in God and I am still not 100% confident that He still loves me because of what I am uncovering about the Church. I will always believe in God. I just want to do it in my own terms.
kolobian
Re: I hate to be Captain Bringdown.
And when i say this, I don't say it to be facetious or anything like that. I'm saying this because there will be a nagging sensation in your subconsciouss that will have to be addressed sooner or later and you may as well get started now:

You will not get your tithing back.

I know that sounds harsh, as if I'm saying the only thing that matters to you is money. I know it's not. It's not about the money.

It's about buyer's remorse. You cannot get a refund, and exchanges are never a good idea.

If you feel like you've made a huge investment in kolobianism and you don't want it all to be for naught, PLEASE take a step back and breathe before you let the inevitable fisherman try to lure you into other religions.

That will only be treating the symptom. Sorry about your tithing. It did not go to help poor people. But if you're ever in Salt Lake City on a hot summer day you can stop by the City Creek Mall and enjoy the air conditioning. It may not be worth 10 years of tithing, but it's worth something.

That's my .02.


Raptor Jesus
Feeling stupid is normal too.
So is expecting god to hate you.

Good news there, though!

The Mormon god doesn't exist.

So, he can't hate you for what you've found out.


scooter
you'll do fine
there are many caring people here who have blazed the trail you are about to follow.

They all agree that it's worth it.

wooden submarines? really? if it was a submarine made of wood, it would have to float, right?


SusieQ#1
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Welcome to the world of God Myths disguised as the One and Only True Church! It's all the same stuff: metaphysical, supernatural, visionary claims by someone who says God speaks to him/her!
Nothing new here folks.
Move along! :-)
For the Big Picture, get the book: The Power of Myth by Joseph Campbell. The hardback is great. The pictures are terrific! I'm big on pictures! :-)
CA girl
We are all here for you angelina5
Cause we've all been where you are. That combination of finding the truth out and then all the feelings that go with it. That first pulling at the threads of Mormonism and watching how fast it unravels. And weirdly, the more you learn, the more you realize how much proof there is that you are right and the Mormons are lying (yes, some inadvertently because they really want to believe but still...) This board is the best place to come for questions because there are so many who have done so much research not just about the facts of Mormonism but how it can actually be a damaging way to live your life. They want to be seen as a harmless religion that is worth living, even if you don't understand everything. But that's as false as the first vision story.

Some days life will seem better and some days it will be hard but life just keeps improving as you go along. I'm sure most people here would second my "testimony" of that. Good luck to you.


Glo
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
I felt the same way.
The minute I heard about the DNA discrepancies I KNEW it wasn't true.

It was a relief to realize that my instincts had been correct all along.


scooter
Beloved speaks truth
if nothing else, watch the Bill Moyers PBS special with Joseph Campbell.

It will be one of the most amazing experiences you can ever have.

haven't read the book, but it's a fabulous recommendation.


honestone
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Of course you feel empowered now. YOU are in charge and they aren't. Glad you did some research and did it on your own. Your life will be so much better out of the cult- no more pushy people to tell you how to spend your money or time, no more lies to spread to others, no more wasted energy doing Church jobs, and no more praise of JS-the man who married the wives of other men. Good luck and know you have chosen the right path - one free of Mormonism.
blueorchid
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
When I was a kid, there was a big framed quote in the church near the front that said "Know the truth and the truth will set you free." They really shouldn't have had that up since the truth only works against them.

I don't think "Honesty is the best policy" would work out too well for them either.

Good for you for not being afraid of the truth. I am excited for you.


anagrammy
It is tempting to plunge right into the facts that you were forbidden to access.
However, I support those who are directing you to read Joseph Campbell's "Power of Myth" and here's why:

Feeling you are stupid for having been duped is common and Joseph Campbell offers a cogent answer to the question, "How could I fall for this stuff?" You are drawn to the mythology behind it. You read this and you'll understand why people followed Joseph Smith in spite of obvious evidence that he was an adulterer, dishonest, etc.

Mixed emotions will be frequent--some days feeling free and light, other days feeling guilty and isolated. There is something fabulous for women when we finally say, "Enough!" and reclaim our power over our own life. We are not Adamic retreads who are not as accountable for our actions as men. We are fully functional human beings--each one different from the next. Not wombs and tits burdened unnecessarily with brains.

I commend you for having the courage to read what you were told not to read. You are like the hero in George Orwell's 1984--you stepped away from the monitoring eye of Big Brother. Congratulations and welcome to the board.

Post often!

Anagrammy


jessica
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Three sites that helped me--
http://www.mormonthink.com/

Video about BOA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hcyzkd_m6KE

Video about leaving the church by John Dehlin
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZQJc5SxnVs


angelina5
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Lol! Thank you! The truth will set me free. I still feel wobbly but a lot of things make sense now.
angelina5
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Wow thank you for this!!! I have looked at mormonthink.com and have found great things on there.
Ex-CultMember
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
You are lucky that it isn't taking you as long as some of us to swallow the hard truth. I started reading stuff critical of Mormonism but it took me a long time to finally let go of the church. It really bothered me and I wanted so badly for it to be true. It was all I knew (because I grew up in the church). I am far happier NOW, but there was some growing pains for me as I transitioned out. I was truly brainwashed.

You are lucky you haven't been in the church that long and that you are actually using your BRAIN. Its pretty crazy all the stuff you'll be learning and realizing that so many Mormons have NO IDEA about it.


angelina5
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
I felt like I could take on the whole world today and I feel like I can see LDS individuals as a circle if people who are so engrained in their beliefs, like I was an outsider. Very interesting indeed!
angelina5
Re: I hate to be Captain Bringdown.
Thank you. I have stopped paying my tithing a few months ago actually. I have tithing settlement next Sunday ;-) Will
Let you know how that goes!
angelina5
Re: Beloved speaks truth
I'm excited to watch the pbs program. Will make sure to watch that. I am making a list of materials.

Ex-CultMember
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Here's a list of some good reliable books about Mormonism that provide the truth. The ones with stars I consider priority reading in each category. Obviously you don't need to read them all but its nice to have a list if you need it.

History/Joseph Smtih
* Mormonism - Shadow or Reality? (or The Changing World of Mormonism) by Jerald & Sandra Tanner
* An Insider’s View of Mormon Origins by Grant Palmer
* No Man Knows My History: The Life of Joseph Smith by Fawn M. Broadie
* The Mormon Hierarchy: Origins of Power by D. Michael Quinn
* The Mormon Hierarchy: Extensions of Power by D. Michael Quinn
Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer
Mormon America, The Power and the Promise by Richard Ostling, Joan K. Ostling
One Nation Under Gods: A History of the Mormon Church by Richard Abanes
Joseph Smith: Rough Stone Rolling by Richard Lyman Bushman
Joseph Smith: The Making of a Prophet by Dan Vogel
Joseph Smith: The First Mormon by Donna Hill
The Prophet Puzzle: Interpretive Essays on Joseph Smith by Bryan Waterman
Joseph Smith and the Origins of The Book of Mormon by David Persuitte
The Keystone of Mormonism by Arza Evans
The New Mormon History: Revisionist Essays on the Past by D. Michael Quinn
Mormon Mavericks: Essays on Dissenters - John Sillito and Susan Staker

Polygamy
* In Sacred Loneliness: The Plural Wives of Joseph Smith by Todd Compton
* Mormon Enigma: Emma Hale Smith by Linda King Newell
Mormon Polygamy: A History by Richard S. Van Wagoner
Solemn Covenant: The Mormon Polygamous Passage by B. Carmon Hardy
Nauvoo Polygamy: “… but we called it celestial marriage” by George D. Smith

Book of Mormon
*New Approaches to the Book of Mormon: Explorations in Critical Methodology by Brent Metcalfe
*Quest for the Gold Plates: Thomas Stuart Ferguson’s Archaeological Search for the Book of Mormon by Stan Larson
*American Apocrypha: Essays on the Book of Mormon by Dan Vogel and Brent Lee Metcalfe
Losing a Lost Tribe: Native Americans, DNA, and the Mormon Church by Simon G. Southerton

Book of Abraham
*By His Own Hand Upon Papyrus: A New Look at the Joseph Smith Papyri by Charles M. Larson

Folk Magic/Occult Practices
* Early Mormonism and the Magic World View by D. Michael Quinn

Temple
*Evolution of the Mormon Temple Ceremony: 1842-1990 by Jerald and Sandra Tanner
The Mysteries of Godliness: A History of Mormon Temple Worship - David John Buerger

Mountain Meadows Massacre
Blood of the Prophets: Brigham Young and the Massacre at Mountain Meadows by Will Bagley
The Mountain Meadows Massacre by Brooks, Juanita

Misc
Line Upon Line: Essays on Mormon Doctrine by Gary James Bergera
Power From On High: The Development of Mormon Priesthood - Gregory A. Prince


darth jesus
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
welcome to the forum! glad you decided to take the red pill.

i have nothing else to add. my comments and thoughts are pretty much in alignment with what everybody has already said.

the road out of the cult is not easy but it's doable. there's a lot of pain, disappointment, sadness peppered with anger. that's normal.

anything you need just post.


jessica
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
You are welcome! Start looking for books and other resources..when I first started questioning I couldn't get enough anytime anyone mentioned a website or book here I'd look it up or try to get it. Still have a few books to read but I've got the basics down now. I pored over Mormonthink for a long time, its a great website! John Dehlin's Mormonstories is good as well, (http://mormonstories.org/) I finally heard through his podcasts real people having the same concerns I did, not the usual pray about it but real people with real problems.
SL Cabbie
And the Beautiful Thing About Coming Here...
Nobody is going to tell you Satan has you firmly in his grasp...

All reasonable roads of inquiry lead out of the LDS Church...

And it's nobody's fault who's alive these days that it's a fraud...

Welcome....


angelina5
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Thank you for taking the time to write all of this. The more I discover, the better I feel actually.

angelina5
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
I just started to upload his podcasts. Thanks!


mia
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
A word of caution:

Don't think anyone at church will understand, or want to hear about your discoveries. Don't think they will have answers. They don't even want to hear the questions. People at church may say and do some incredibly rude and hurtful things. You will lose friends. Just know that it's not about you.


presbyterian
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
At the risk of insulting the atheists here, I believe God still has you enfolded in His loving arms. Take some time to look into other faiths and see if one is a good fit.

angelina5
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
I have already seen a little bit. I asked my husband about Adam/ God, the Masonry and his first question was: "Have you been reading anti-Mormon literature?". He couldn't answer why do we share symbols with the freemasons.


lostinutah
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
ALso, be aware that threads here get closed after a certain length, so start another if you want, it's not personal when it's closed.
angelina5
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
I really needed to hear this. I believed in God before I joined the Church and always will. I am still not confident on how He feels about my discovery that the Church is most likely not true.
mia
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
walk softly with DH. I was a rare case, we both left at the same time. Just know he may not be on the same page. If he was BIC he has a lot more to purge than a convert. It can be a rough and very long road.

We both still have a strong belief in God. We have that in common. I think it made the transition easier.


orphan
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Raptor, you need to let this young lady know who you are. She's trying to find the truth. If you have questions Angelina5 someone on this site can help. Jim
angelina5
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Thank you! Who is Raptor?
honestone
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
Glad you are still a believer in God and there are so many churches out there to fulfill that desire to worship in a group setting if that is what you want....and guess what...no one will track you down for tithing or to ask Why haven't you been to church? Go at your own pace and maybe with time your hubby may try one out as well.
imaworkinonit
PLEASE go slow on revealing doubts to your husband
I highly recommend "Combatting Cult Mind Control" by Steven Hassan. It entertaining, you get to learn about the Moonies, and you'll learn about how you were controlled.

There's a section on helping someone out of a cult. If you go too fast with your husband, you activate cult defensiveness (the accusation that you were reading anti-mormon literature), and then he won't listen to you. You become the enemy.

Try talking about Bible problems first. Mormons KNOW there are problems with the Bible. So they are more open to that. Possible areas of discussion: creation story vs. evolution; the Noah Story; talking donkeys; sun standing still during battle; age of the earth 6000 years? Try reading "The Age of Reason" by Thomas Paine for more ideas.

But many of Mormonism's beliefs rest on Bible stories. Example: the Tower of Babel links to the Book of Mormon.

Good luck. You are on your way, girl! Life is better out here!


forbiddencokedrinker
Re: I hate to be Captain Bringdown.
My advice is that you skip it. Tell them something came up. They will give you a copy of your tithing donations in the mail if they have to, because I believe law requires them to, but I would have to look it up. If they won't tell them you need the paper to file for taxes, and that you don't have time to actually come in. Once you put it off past January, it won't really be an issue for the Bishop, because he will have already sent off his yearly report to SLC.
forbiddencokedrinker
Re: I am opening my eyes and discovering that it is probably not true
I don't know if God exists or not. I will tell you one thing, if he does, then he probably doesn't hate you for using your gift of free will, since he was the one that gave it to you. This applies to all man made religions, and all their holy books.

"Recovery from Mormonism - www.exmormon.org"